#15 On Being Moved 🧡
Pacing myself.
March 2025
How am I doing? How are you doing? Really.
Sometimes, it is hard to find the words. It is even harder to find words when not having any. I notice myself being somewhere in between.
Between good and bad,
between happy and sad,
between joy and disappointment.
It is okay. It is normal. Once I lean, either way… it can be overwhelming. So much so that I do not know what to do with the feeling.
It is okay, too. Not knowing. Letting the feeling be, sitting with it, acknowledging it. Not rushing it.
It is okay to sit with my thoughts, searching for a more nuanced answer. At the same time, it comes with the fear of losing those thoughts. The urge to do, collapsing into the lack of doing. They come, they go. Still unlearning the need to always be productive.
It is okay to stare out of the window.
It is okay to need movement, even in rest. That clearing the sink, folding the laundry - these small tasks are not failures of stillness (anyone else who thought that way?) but for me actually another way of resetting. Resetting is different for everyone.1
It is okay to recognise that a message becomes a distraction. To open an app unrelated to the message, a reflex of old habits. Me, unable to step away or take the time to answer properly. I want to be there, really there, not scattered across a dozen half-finished conversations. To trust that a real connection does not disappear just because I take a moment.
It is okay to see everyone around seemingly waking up from hibernation, while still unfolding, bit by bit.
It’s not that this little micro-season is uncomfortable. Rather, it’s itchy. Like a layer you’re wearing and want to remove but are having a difficult time pulling off. - Anna Brones2
It is okay to question one’s authentic self. Why do we have to be more out there, be more this, be more that? To understand that it is about letting go of the pressure to being someone else, without the pressure of becoming.
It is okay to feel a sense of despair in the process of finding, to appreciate the present of being. To be on the "neuron highway,"3 caught in a depressive thought loop. To feel overwhelmed. To look for routines that help, and to unlearn others that no longer serve. To remain curious.
It is okay to question how can I believe in me, how can I be here with me.
It is okay to feel good.
It is okay to feel bad.
It is okay to feel happy.
It is okay to feel sad.
It is okay to feel joy.
It is okay to feel disappointment.
It is okay to take time to figure out my journey.
It is okay to find my own pace.
'On Being Moved’ is a monthly series of exploring and expressing observations and thoughts - through both written and visual formats. Not sure yet of its direction, however each step forward is a step 'on being moved'. Welcome ♥
Further reading: Burnout - The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Emily and Amelia Nagoski (2019).
What Happens When We Burn Out? by Anna Brones (2025).
For more on the topic, check out: The Answer to Almost Everything. Episode 42: What Makes Us Depressed? by Arte (2025).
It is okay to take time to figure out my journey.
It is okay to find my own pace.
It is okay. Thank you! <3